life collection

In the midst of a fibromyalgia flare up. It's really not fun. Especially because I don't have a primary care doctor, or rheumatologist that gives a shit or has any interest in treating my fibromyalgia. So I can't contact any dr. to get help during a flare up. I have been put on a basic pain medication and that's it. Luckily, my psychiatrist is awesome and has put me on Lyrica which has helped my pain a lot.

I am actually going outside my insurance coverage for care after trying over three doctors for treatment of my fibromyalgia on my current insurance. The thing is, it is really hard to get an appointment with a good doctor. I made an appointment to see a rheumatologist in the beginning of July and my appointment isn't until September 26th! I've called some other doctors and they aren't accepting new patients. I really just don't know what else to do. I can't believe it is this difficult to get proper care of a chronic pain condition, it's crazy!

I still haven't come to terms with having fibro. I want to pretend I don't have it. I push myself way (way) too hard. I do things no matter how much pain I am in because I know they need to get done. I don't like having limits. I don't like asking for help, or being able to not do something, so I push so damn hard and I end up paying for it later. I seriously won't stop doing things until I physically can't do them, and even then I still do too much.

I currently can't do much of anything. It sucks so much. I am so frustrated and sad. So the kitchen is a mess and the entire house is cluttered. I can hardly shower and we don't have a bathtub that works well enough to use on my own. On top of it all, I have prescriptions to fill, appointments to go to, calls to make, and grocery shopping. How do people do this? I seriously need a nanny.

Love, C